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The Window of Tolerance

Window of Tolerance Infographic

An infographic from the National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine.

Download PDF

About the Window of Tolerance

From the Work of Dan Siegel

From the Work of Dan Siegel

From the Work of Dan Siegel

Developed in the work of Dan Siegel, The Window of Tolerance is one of the most important concepts in working with our trauma, the ways in which we suffer, and the simple rigors of daily living and relationships. It can also help strengthen our compassion toward the suffering of others when they are acting out. This, in turn, can increase our capacity to stay in safe connection with both our own self and other people.  

A Range of Regulation

From the Work of Dan Siegel

From the Work of Dan Siegel

The Window of Tolerance (WOT) is range in which we can tolerate and manage the felt sense of what is happening right now. It’s your ability to “roll” with the stimulation of the now. It’s the skills available to you in the moment for self-regulation and self-soothing. It is significantly a function of neurobiology, our history of attachment, and our trauma stories. 

Flexible and Brittle Panes

Flexible and Brittle Panes

Flexible and Brittle Panes

It also fluctuates circumstantially and can be influenced by "simple" things such as eating and sleeping. If you wake rested and have a good breakfast, feel fabulous about how you look today, have a nourishing spiritual practice time, pet a street dog, and someone says something kind to you, then your WOT is likely stronger. If not, then probably not. If you did not sleep well and rushed out the door without breakfast, feel disheveled, did not take time for a spiritual practice, a dog growled at you, and someone said you look like a mess today (and it was true), your WOT might have be rather fragile and break easily today.

Dysregulation: It Happens

Flexible and Brittle Panes

Flexible and Brittle Panes

Dysregulated means that on a neurological level we unconsciously surrender more and more control to autonomic responses and become reactive.  Whatever else might be happening, it is a function of feeling unsafe, danger, or "life threat."  In truth, sometimes we do "jump out" of the WOT on our own (e.g. not noticing our level of irritation, agitation, or anxiety when reading news or social media).


Hyperarousal is dysregulation that carries a lot of energy:  anger, fighting, fleeing, anxiety, or other "active" reactions.


Hypoarousal is dysregulation with low or suppressed energy:  depression, freezing, shut down, spacey, or other "low and slow" reactions.

Important Reminders About Dysregulation

Dysregulation looks different in different people and different circumstances; but three important things to remember about dysregulation: 

  1. It is a part of the condition of being human, it happens to all of us. Remember, it happens to others, too.
  2. It is not a moral failure. Yes, it can have consequences that need repair and reconciliation. Yes, we can work to expand our WOT and learn to better self-regulate. But this still does not mean that dysregulation is a sign or symptom of moral failing. Judging yourself is likely increase their occurrence; compassionate (courageous) self-awareness and self-discovery are helpful.
  3. Dysregulation comes as a result of our sense of safety being overwhelmed and is a function of our autonomic nervous system. This means the responses are largely beyond our control, particularly as they are activated (turned on and turned up). The further we go outside our WOT, the more our dysregulation will increase. It is usually helpful to learn more about our safety needs so that we can take increasing responsibility for our own safety.

Trauma-Informed Spiritual Direction
Notice the Journey
Shannon Michael Pater
Miksang Photography

Help with Self-Soothing and Regulation

This is a really helpful video from NICABM and Peter Levine on two simple techniques of self-soothing and self-regulation.

Window of Tolerance: Supporting the Wellbeing of Children

This is an excellent paper (not mine) with lots of helpful information, graphics, and practices for all ages.

Download PDF

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